For parents of young children, Sunday mornings bring a dilemma: SOCCER OR CHURCH. Both are important and both are vital in a young person's development. An article in NEWSDAY reveals that other Christian Churches on Long Island are feeling the effects of this dilemma very much with declining Church and Sunday School attendance. (Please note: this fact was reported prior to September 11th.) Families are caught in the middle of trying to do the very best for their children and keeping their priorities in the right order. For those of us in the Catholic tradition, Mass is offered both on Saturday evening, at a variety of times on Sunday morning and, in some parishes, Sunday evening. Right here in this local community, you can drive ten to fifteen minutes in any direction to find a large choice of Mass times between Saturday evening and Sunday evening. It is impressive to see many of our young people coming to Mass with their families in their "team uniform" before or after the game! Many families are showing that it is possible to balance the sporting events with that ONE HOUR A WEEK FOR GOD. We need these families to lead and inspire others that it can be done!!
Families with children also need help in teaching their children how to acquire an understanding and appreciation for the Mass. The children's attention spans make it difficult to sit quietly for one hour, yet these little ones are anxious, eager and inquisitive to the sounds and actions of our sacred liturgy. Who among us has not heard the lilting voice of a little one adding their own sung version of the Alleluia verse before the Gospel reading!! Many Parents prefer to sit in the main body of the Church with their children, since the Daily Mall Chapel/Crying Room does little to teach children how to sit ,be still, watch and listen. Yet, Parents are very conscious of disturbing others from praying and listening. This is a real dilemma for families. With a little understanding from all members of the parish, we can work together to ease this dilemma. A few helpful suggestions:
Young Parents need to realize that not all children are ready to attend a full Mass each Sunday. If children are sick or feeling out of sorts, they might be more comfortable at home. Also, during the Mass, it is helpful to give your children a break and escort them into the lobby area. We have speakers in the lobby now so you can still hear what is going on inside the Church. If you attend the same Mass each week, notice where other families with children are seated and try to sit in that section. Sometimes the noise that your children make seems louder than it really is.
Encourage your children to participate at Mass. Even pre-schoolers can begin to say the responses like "Thanks be to God" or shake hands at the Sign of Peace. Ask the ushers for the special hardcover Mass books that are loaned to young children each week so they may participate at Mass. All our first level students in Religious education have received their own "My Mass Book' when they began the program to help them become acquainted with the Mass. As your children grow older, you need to prompt them to sing and respond to the prayers each week.
A few practical points are good to keep in mind: make sure your children are comfortable, fed and brought to the bathroom prior to coming to Church. Find the time of day when they are at their best: early morning, mid-morning, late morning or early evening----you can be sure to find a nearby Church with a Mass time to suit your needs! Reward your children if they were good in Church for starters. Cookies or a special donut usually do the trick. After the Sunday Masses in our parish, we have hospitality. This might serve as a reward or something for the children to look forward to. While speaking about hospitality...........please realize that this gesture is for AFTER MASS and should be consumed in the LOBBY AREA ONLY. We thank you for helping us to keep our Church a holy and reverent place.
Even though taking children to Mass may be difficult at times, remember the rewards outweigh the frustrations. Bringing your children to Mass is an excellent way to build a sense of tradition. After all, all of us want our children to know that "THIS IS WHAT MY FAMILY DOES EACH SUNDAY. WE GO TO MASS." Start them early.
We all need to help children become members of the Church. Just keep in mind that, in the past, most of the adults in the Church have had the same experience that you are now facing.......AND THEY SURVIVED!!!
If growing spiritually is important to parents and they model that–
like exercising or living well–children will too.